This post contains spoilers and may contain offensive language.
If you don’t like either, please cover your eyes now.
Sorry for the delay Bite Clubbers. This week’s episode had a lot of overlapping story arcs so instead of breaking it down by character and having this post become redundant, I’ve decided to group certain characters together. Without further ado, here’s Sunday’s recap.
Sookie / Bill / Tara / Alcide
The episode starts with Lorena taking a bite, rather forcefully I may add, out of Sookie. She’s in awe at how good she tastes. She asks her what she is and is attacked by Bill from behind. He manages to get a silver chain around her neck and drags her to the floor. He looks over at the stakes and encourages Sookie to stake her. Lorena’s last words are, ‘I love you Bill’ which infuriate Sookie who uses that rage to shove a stake through her heart. (Um, is it just me or was the geyser of blood a little much?) Bill ends up covered in blood and loses consciousness. Sookie starts to scream for help. Tara and Alcide pull the truck up to the front of the house and tell Sookie that they need to leave. Sookie says she is not leaving without Bill. They start to help her wrap him up in a tarp when Debbie walks in. She’s high as a kite and points a gun at them. Alcide asks Debbie to put the gun down and to let Sookie and Tara leave with Bill. It then turns into one hell of a Mexican standoff ending with Tara tackling Debbie to the ground, Alcide grabbing the gun, Coot walking in, Alcide putting a bullet between his eyes and Debbie threatening to come after Alcide if he doesn’t kill her. They pile Bill into the back of Alcide's van and Sookie says she’s going to stay in the back with him. Tara tells her that he’s not going to make it and Sookie loses her cool and screams that she’s going to stay in the back of the van with him. Alcide and Tara hop into the front and take off. They’re chased down by several wolves but, manage to escape. Sookie pleads with Bill to give her a sign and decides to cut open her arm so that he can feed. Things take a seriously wrong turn and Bill attacks Sookie and starts to feed on her heavily. Her eyes roll into the back of her head and she starts to lose consciousness. Alcide pulls the truck over so he can relieve himself and Tara heads to the back of the van to check on Sookie. After repeated knocks without an answer from Sookie, Tara throws the door open and finds Sookie unconscious and Bill wondering what the hell is going on. Tara loses it and kicks Bill out of the van. Alcide gets back in the van and takes off toward the hospital. Interestingly enough, Bill is not burning up as fast as he normally would. He realizes he can’t take off after the van and heads into the woods. They make it to the hospital and Sookie gets carted into ER. They try to transfuse her with blood but she starts to convulse. The doctor heads out and tells Tara and Alcide that she’s lost a lot of blood. Tara starts to go all Tara on the doctor and the doctor explains that Sookie doesn’t have a known blood type. The doctor fears the worst and Tara breaks down. Tara calls Jason to let him know what happened with Sookie. While everyone is by her bedside wishing her well, Sookie starts to dream that she wakes. She follows a trail of flowers down the corridor. The doors open up to reveal what I’m guessing is HBO’s version of utopia. (If you ask me it was weird.) And in walks Claudine (who is nothing like I pictured her in my mind) and they step out into this garden utopia. After a cool refreshing glass of glowing water they head of to dance. (Yes, I said dance. I know, it’s just keeps getting weirder). Claudine tries to convince Sookie to come with her, when a darkness falls over the garden. Darkness in garden utopias apparently mean vampires because when we flash back to the hospital we see Bill has walked into the room. Claudine urges her to come with her and the others into the pond. Claudine warns that Bill will try to take her light. After refusing to go with Claudine, Claudine makes her promise not to let Bill steal her light. The garden goes dark and Sookie collapses to the ground. Bill begs Jason to let him help Sookie and Jason, after some deliberation, agrees. Sookie finally comes to from her coma and upon seeing Bill starts screaming her head off.
Sam pulls up to the spot where he thinks Tommy might be and is stopped by a redneck bodyguard. The man denies there’s any dog fighting going on and pulls his shotgun on Sam. He confiscates Sam's gun and makes him turn around and leave. Sam pulls into a wooded area and shape shifts into a pitbull to try to get into the dog fights. Sam finds some guys getting dogs ready for the fights and lets himself get captured by one of them. The guy takes Sam back to the kennels where the rest of the dogs are and while the guy is distracted shifts back into human form and knocks him out and drags him off. We get to see the next fight being set up and it ends up being Tommy versus the meanest Rottweiler I’ve ever seen. Just as they’re about to blow the whistle Sam pulls the alarm and starts to let all the dogs out of their kennels. The crowd takes off and Sam steps into the ring in the nick of time. The Rottweiler attempts to snarl at Sam and Sam puts a shape shifter stare on him and subdues the dog. He tells the dog to take off and checks out Tommy’s injuries. He tells Joe Lee to give Tommy his clothes. Joe Lee starts to protest and Sam yells at him to give Tommy his clothes. Sam goes all over Melinda and Joe Lee for being the worst parents in the universe. He tells Tommy that he can’t promise him a perfect life but, he can promise him one better than the one he’s got. After some hesitation Tommy decides to leave with Sam.
Poor Jason is sitting at home on his lazy boy in his boxers listening to depressing rock music. It seems he’s pretty torn up about finding out Crystal has a fiancé. Hoyt walks in and they start talking about what happened. Jason says that he has a ton of questions floating in his head and that he can’t figure out how he fell in love with her so fast. Hoyt tries to snap him out of it by making a joke about Hot Shot’s claim to fame and Jason becomes upset. Hoyt apologizes and Jason accepts his apology. Hoyt then gives Jason the idea of going down to the police station and questioning the guy they have in custody about Crystal. Jason heads off to get ready and Hoyt receives an unexpected visit from the new girl he’s dating. Jason heads to the jail to question the drug dealer he took down. Jason finds out the guy is Crystal’s cousin. He starts asking questions and the guy thinks Jason’s trying to get him to rat on his people. Then Jason says that he knows that Crystal is a good person and that since they’re family he wouldn’t want to see her in a bad situation. The guy says he’ll tell him whatever he wants to know if he can get some drugs. At that moment Andy walks in and asks Jason what he’s doing. Jason says he’s sweeping and Andy obviously doesn’t believe him. He tells Jason that more cop cars need to be washed and he leaves the holding cells. Jason heads over to Merlotte’s to try and score some meth from Lafayette. During their back and forth he gets a call from Tara about Sookie. Tara tells him that Sookie is in a coma and he takes off with Lafayette on his heels. Upon his arrival, Jason is getting bombarded by a hospital worker and Lafayette dismisses her. Alcide takes off to smooth things over and Jason starts to open up about Sookie. Things get emotional when Jason talks to Sookie about coming back to them and being all that he has left.
Eric brings out Hadley (the Queen’s lover and Sookie’s cousin) and informs the Queen that he is going to drain her unless she tells him about Sookie Stackhouse. The Queen does not buy into the bluff and refuses to say anything. (Did I mention they have her locked up in a big, gold birdcage?) Eric sinks his fangs into Hadley’s neck and starts to drink from her. He comes up for some air and asks the Queen again to tell him about Sookie. She says that she has no idea what he’s talking about. He drinks from Hadley again and finally Hadley opens up and tells Eric what he wants to know. Unfortunately, for us she whispers it in his ear so we still have no clue what Sookie is. Eric interrupts the Magister’s potential piercing of Pam’s eyelid to inform him that the Queen is with him. He starts to explain that he did in fact sell V at the behest of the queen. When the Magister accuses him of throwing his Queen under the bus, Eric states that his loyalties now lie with Mississippi. And in walks in the King of Mississippi himself. And this is where it gets fun. Russell basically takes a crap on anything and everything the Magister has to say and basically anoints himself the new ‘powers that be’. And then Russell does something pretty amazing. He takes Pam out of her chains and puts the Magister in her place. He tells the Magister that it’s vampires like him that have been holding back vampires for centuries. Russell ends up torturing the Magister until he pronounces he and Sophie-Anne husband and wife. He then goes on a tirade about abdicating authority and Eric cuts in and asks him if he’s ready to go. They start to head off but, Russell changes his mind. He faces the Magister and tells him to say hello to the true death. And then chops his head off! Fade to black….
Alcide putting his big boy pants on
It's about time if you ask me. I'd say he's redeemed himself for letting Sookie get captured in the first place.
I'm not going to lie, I got a little emotional during his speech to Sookie.
Russell and his over the topness (it’s a word for today)
I love that he's soo dramatic.
The fairy garden
Um, yeah. I'm still trying to figure that whole thing out.
The ridiculous amount of bloodWas all that really necessary?
Sam not beating the hell out of Joe Lee
Sorry but, the guy has it coming.
Favorite One Liners
‘You wouldn’t know love if it kicked you in the fangs.’
-Sookie to Lorena
‘I will sniff you out. I will. I will come after you and I will hunt you down.’
-Debbie to Alcide
‘I never really thought I was smart enough to get depressed but, here I am.’
-Jason to Hoyt
‘You’re a Christian Hoyt. It ain’t cool to judge.’
-Jason to Hoyt
‘I’m almost a cop!’
-Jason to Hot Shot drug dealer
‘My heart bleeds for you.’
-Hot Shot drug dealer to Andy
‘There’s a new f***ing authority in town!’
-Russell to Magister
‘Of course my lil’ puddin.’
-Russell to Sophie-Anne
'I’m so happy I could bleed.’
-Sophie-Anne to Russell
So I wasn't able to find a lot of pictures but, I did manage to find some videos to put up.
What did you think about Episode 7 Bite Clubbers?
Drop us some comments and let us know what's on your mind.